It's Your Problem, Not Mine

Why am I here and what is my purpose? I constantly ask that question to see if I'm living "on purpose" and in alignment with my highest self.

In the most simple of words, I was born to be a catalyst for people to transform their lives into living "on purpose". I am living in this truth, yet I am challenged, sometimes daily.

The seemingly simple act of my housemate's choice to tell me a day before his rent is due by email, that he would be late in paying me his share of the rent has me thinking that I need to set boundaries (again) with someone who doesn't understand what being 100% responsible means. We co-habit the same home. I am approachable. I prefer to have business transactions face to face, when it affects my life and my daily operations. Not by email...

One of the concepts in my coaching practice I instill in my clients is to be 100% responsible for their lives. That means all of their lives. Whatever needs to be addressed, no matter how large or how small needs to be taken care of. Not a day before there is an issue. It needs immediate attention. Chris, my housemate, told me a story about his car breaking down while his kids were visiting last weekend, and that's why his rent isn't going to be on time. I'm not one for other people's stories. In fact, I like to deal with fact and not story.

So, in a sense, he's making his problem my problem.

That doesn't work for me. I've told him this situation of paying the rent late or in installments doesn't work for me once before, and lo and behold, it hasn't happened for months, and now it shows up again. If he would have come to me sooner, then I can plan for these things. But a steady diet of irresponsible behavior (and yes, I consider this irresponsible, when rent is due on the 1st and it's not there) will manifest nothing but more of the same in all areas of one's life. His justification was that his rent check was early for a few months.

I had many, many unexpected expenses this past month. Car maintenance, cat vet bills, eye exam and new glasses. Yet, I don't go to the mortgage company and whine "I've had big expenses this month, can you take a rain check for my payment until I get things straightened out?" My credit would be in the toliet if I operated that way. I know what money it takes to meet my expenses, and those bills come around regularly, like clockwork every month. Sometimes, I have unexpected expenses, and I deal with them effectively, too. That's being 100% responsible.

My coaching mentor, Debbie Ford, has a saying that I always think about. "No one is coming to save you." No one can do what you can do for yourself. Sure, it's important to have support when you need it or you're down on your luck. But if you exhibit behaviors day in and day out that aren't in alignment with what you want in life, you are committed to something other than what you say you want. And I'm not the person who is going to save you. In fact, I face these very issues myself, and I can only save myself from going down a path of denial and self-sabotage. I'm working on my issues; those problems are mine, and they are not yours. Likewise, I don't want your problems, either.

I know from personal experience. I said this past week, I was committed to getting my taxes ready to enter into spread sheets so I could file my return early. I did some organizing and I'm feeling better about the work I've done, but I still haven't organized my tax papers yet. So, I got to really take a look at what I was committed to this weekend. I would say I was committed to movement and dance, taking care of my 18 year-old cat who has been sick, household chores, and connecting with people. All of those are good things to have scheduled in one's life for balance, and setting priorities is important. But ignoring or denying important or critical time-sensitive tasks needing attention is like drawing a bath upstairs, running the water, then deciding to go watch an hour-long television show downstairs. Sooner or later, the water is going to flood the upstairs, collapse the ceiling, flood the downstairs, and there's no ignoring expense, mess, and stress that flood restoration can entail.

What can you do today to show the Universe you are 100% responsible for your life? Are you willing to contain your "story" so it doesn't spill into the lives of others, affecting them to take action for your irresponsible behavior? Are you willing to take care of incompletions that hold your energy, both in the areas of relationship and tasks? What will you do today to energetically get what you want and release what isn't working? All it takes is one step in the direction of being responsible, and you will see great changes happening in your world. Guaranteed!

Shame, Guilt, Self-Sabotage, and Coming Clean

"It is only when we have the courage to face things exactly as they are, without any self-deception or illusion, that a light will develop out of events, by which the path to success may be recognized." I Ching

Concealing and withholding hides a shadow belief, guilt, or shame about something in our past. The ego creates a clever laundry list of obstacles to healing old wounds. Justifications, excuses, blame, resentment, righteous positions, and arrogance all mask a repressed quality or hidden action that we would rather not take responsibility for. We may justify what we did by saying "I did that in the past; it has no bearing on my life now".

Until we stop the trance of denial by standing in the truth of our past, that very energy that we conceal, don't want to feel, or deny holds more of our future in bondage than anyone can fathom. Withholding due to shame or guilt may even seem like setting a personal boundary; when we don't come clean with ourselves, our actions, and our relations in every way to cleanse our psyche, we're bathing ourselves in unclean conditions, and we still embody the same very toxic feelings that shamed us. When we tell ourselves a story or interpret events that imprint guilt as something from our past that doesn't require a thorough clean-up, and we choose the option of hiding behind our justifications or excuses, that very shame and guilt weaves its way into our lives like the mismatched thread running through a yard of fabric; if that one ill-fitting thread isn't fully integrated into the whole weave cleanly, it disintegrates the whole fabric of our lives. Withholding and not coming clean with shame or guilt will show up again and again as a pattern somewhere in relationships, and is a clear form of self-sabotage. Quoting my mentor, Debbie Ford, "the guilty seek punishment". When we don't clean our house internally, the consequences can be devastating. Relationships implode, lives can be impacted negatively, and ultimately, that shame and guilt will follow us wherever we go, like lead weights strapped to our body.

When we illuminate the darkest actions and deeds and the pain we inflicted onto others by projection, and take responsibility for our actions in a clear manner, then we are able to observe what needs cleaning up. When we are willing to be truthful, without any deception that the ego can blanket us with, we can step into responsibility and clear out the clutter of unfinished business. From there, the heart can open to true forgiveness, for self-forgiveness and to ask forgiveness to any relations who stepped into the cross-hairs of the shame or guilt we claimed and projected. Going through a total process of completing any unfinished business, taking responsibility, and opening the door to forgiveness offers our multi-colored, woven life threads integration, and the opportunity to create alignment with our most deepest desires.

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The Birth of Our Shadow

How can you use your shadow instead of your shadow using you?
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Michael Jackson's Words

Michael Jackson
August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009

"Consciousness expresses itself through creation. This world we live in is the dance of the creator. Dancers come and go in the twinkling of an eye, but the dance lives on. On many an occasion, when I am dancing, I have felt touched by something sacred. In those moments, I felt my spirit soar and become one with everything that exists. I become the stars and the moon. I become the lover and the beloved. I become the victor and the vanquished. I become the master and the slave. I become the singer and the song. I become the knower and the known. I keep on dancing and then, it is the eternal dance of creation. The creator and the creation merge into one wholeness of joy. I keep on dancing—until there is only... the dance.

–Michael Jackson 1992

May you dance amongst the stars now, dear Michael.

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Wordie Art

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Funny... You don't look Asian...

How I came to be Lori Shin...



On some of my business stationery, I have the Kanji symbol shown above, as a design element. I remember going to an interview, and having the principals of the company I interviewed for look at me in a very odd way when I walked in. They said something to the effect that they thought I was Asian, because of my "logo" on my resume. The Kanji symbol is pronounced Shin. I adopted the symbol, because of my name. More on how that name came to be for me...



The symbol above is the Hebrew letter Shin. You can find the letter Shin on the mezuzah, a parchment housed in a decorative case, and affixed to the front doorframe of Jewish homes. On the parchment is a prayer in Hebrew that begins "Listen, Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One." Shin is also the twenty-first letter in many sematic traditions. In Hebrew, Shin stands for the word Shaddai, a name for God.



In most cases, Shin is the translation for God or Spirit.

In 2004, I was transitioning, of sorts. My marriage was ending, I was working as a market researcher, and I was conducting high level interviews with decision makers on very expensive medical products, like CT Scan machines. Sometimes I wasn't able to talk to the person assigned to me, and my supervisor at the time asked me what name I would like to leave for a call back. She knew my martial situation, and what came through me was my last name to be left was Shin. I didn't ponder or ruminate about the name. I also knew it held a very strong vibration, and it humbled me to accept a name that would have me be reminded every day how I might live as a woman of spirit. I felt so grateful this energy came through me, and I felt both the acceptance and the fear that I could never live up to the task.

Those intense feelings marked the separation of not accepting my humanity along with my divinity. The journey to heal the split has been intense, and I still do the work. It's a daily practice, and I will work throughout my life, to accept the totality of who I am. As I learn more, through the the trainings I have been involved with, I've also committed to work with others as a catalyst for people to see their own brilliance. I've had many amazing teachers to guide me through this journey. I've learned from absolutely everyone, from spiritual leaders to everyday people.

I am reminded of Michael Beckwith (one of the featured people in the movie The Secret) and his words.

"God does not call the qualified; God qualifies the called."

I felt I was called, and still feel the call. I trust. It doesn't mean it doesn't scare me like hell. I just trust that through my practice, I will be guided, unencumbered by ego. I surrender my will. These days, it's an easy choice.

And I walk this path with spirit, with a lot of joy, humor, and awe.

Why Good People Do Bad Things

When we fully express and embody the totality of who we are, we heal and stand in our wholeness. When the expression of who we are gets denied or suppressed... well, read this book and see Why Good People Do Bad Things.



Being of Service

"Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Maria Robinson

In this present moment, I'm typing away at a keyboard, looking at an illuminated electronic screen, and digesting the past three days, and the journey I'm on. As integrative coaches and coaches in training with the Ford Institute of Integrative Coaching, we've had three days of gatherings, brainstorming, collective visioning, and this is a powerful, potent group of people who council together. We are from all over the world, from South Africa to Lebanon, to Florida, and everywhere in between. The collective assembly are here, gathering, to give a voice to their thread of the community fabric we weave, to be of service and to make a difference in the world. Some know they want to link into a collective vision, some have projects they already are passionate about, and we all talk out loud about keeping the energetic momentum going, with honesty and integrity. I am humbled and honored to walk this path with so many committed souls.


As I awoke from a very fitful night's sleep, my mind rested in the soft place of service, and I was compelled to scan my own personal history, and bring the question out into the open. What drives my desire to be of service.

It didn't take long to honor the roots of this dialog I was having with myself.


My maternal grandparents, Selma and Herman Bass were catalysts of sorts for my intention to make a difference. Although they believed in the Zionist movement of having a home to all Jews (focusing on Israel), I couldn't call their actions pure Zionist actions. They did believe that Jews should be free to practice their faith in a place of safety. They did take action on a consistent basis, to raise money for Jews to immigrate to the United States. This was at a time, during the Second World War, where it wasn't safe for all to practice their beliefs. I don't have any idea of how many people my grandparents helped, but if even one person was saved by my grandfather and grandmother raising funds for a person to immigrate, that's huge.

Selma and Herman left Europe with my mother and my aunt when it was a clear and present danger to stay in Europe and fall victim to impending oppression. They came to the United States, and settled in Cleveland, Ohio. In Luxembourg, my grandfather owned a furniture factory (beautiful pieces of the furniture are still in the family; a few pieces came to the U.S.). In Europe, my grandparents lived a good, somewhat privileged life.

They started over with their two teenage daughters, rebuilding and recreating a new life in America. And my grandparents chose to be of service to others.

When I was growing up, my grandmother always volunteered for things she believed in. She served in the Jewish community in many ways. My mother and my aunt also volunteered their time and talents to many causes, from political ideals, to serving on arts commissions. It's no wonder that I have followed this path to service.

I volunteer in my dance community, offering anything from support to other dancers, to picking up dance camp participants from the airport (people come from all over the world to study the 5Rhythms practice with Melissa Michaels, a first-generation student of Gabrielle Roth's).

I volunteer at etown, a variety/music show that's taped for play on NPR stations. Yes, volunteering can be of service and fun! And I'm gaining clarity on my role with the Collective Heart, the branch of the Ford Institute that is making a difference by building a green school in Uganda, envisioning a transformational approach with education, and we as a collective have only just begun.

Whether you are linked in with a volunteer organization, or want to contribute, doing your part can make a difference. It feels good to give, and in that giving, you will receive. That's how circulation works!

Come join us in creating a world with limitless possibilities. www.thecollectiveheart.org

My Everyday Prayer

Gracious Spirit

• Allow all my actions to be motivated by love.
• Allow me to be detached from all outcomes, and allow the Universe to surprise and delight me.
• Allow gratitude to permeate every cell of my physical being, to spill over into my thoughts and deeds; grateful for even the painful experiences as they open the door to great teachings and wisdom, and the pleasurable experiences, as I relish and savor each delicious offering with curiosity and awe.
• Open me up to more giving from my heart, and more receiving with my heart, as this is the way energy and abundance circulates.
• Allow me to recognize I am always held in the unified field of love and abundance, where all possibility exists.
  
• Let me suspend all judgment in all matters, including myself.
• Allow silence into my life, as well as breath.
• Inspire me to choose consciously; as I choose for myself, I also choose for the larger community.

Let me be used, O Beloved Spirit, to be sourced and resourced, to be filled, and emptied, and filled again, as I journey passionately in this life.

When Life Isn’t Fair… How are You Going to Respond?

Right now, things are topsy-turvy in our world. Globally, financial institutions seem like people diagnosed with multiple personality disorder. One day up, the next day tanking. People are following suit, reactive to the outer world. There's been a lot of denial, poor choices, and a blatant lack of responsibility.

I’m not saying this as a victim, but life isn’t fair. So what can I do to respond, stay grounded and maintain my bearing, when the compass isn’t reading the directions of North, South, East, and West in the usual way?

As an observer, how is it that I can have a great credit score, have never had any late payments with any bills, never have filed for bankruptcy, have equity in my home and work for myself, and still be turned down for refinancing, while people who have been late for payments and trashed their credit over and over be offered greater financial options and lower mortgage payments on their property that might have been foreclosed on.

I do everything in my power to be responsible in my choices and actions.



Yes, life isn’t fair. Yet, how I respond is the only guide to live by. And being 100% responsible is the guiding compass that points me in the direction of where I desire to go. I have to stop reflecting what is going on with others, and really steer the course of my own ship, and stay the course.

I may not like how thing are, but if I stay attached to the belief that they should be different, I am not only asking, I am begging for my own dose of suffering, resentment, and righteousness. I become a victim. I will insist on blaming someone else for situations and circumstances in my life, and I ultimately will be giving my power away.

I don’t consciously surrender my personal power to others these days. I used to, but being a victim isn’t very empowering. Coach training and being coached allows me to take actions that will propel me toward what I want, instead of focusing on what I don't want.

I do surrender my positions to my spiritual practice, with the sincere acceptance to see situations and circumstances in a way I can learn and grow from. I have never been disappointed in that simple act of letting go of the thoughts, beliefs, and positions that don’t serve me, and to ask for that willingness for acceptance to permeate through every cell of my being. I have always been supported by the spiritual source I come from, and eventually will return to. If certain thoughts don’t serve my higher self, they don’t serve the greater good. Then I will be contributing to the global toxicity, instead of allowing a greater good to flow through me, and open me up to new possibilities.

With that action of willingness, acceptance, and surrender, I really can serve the world, with authenticity and humility. That's a response that could ignite a quiet revolution! Try it!

When the news isn't good

No, the news isn't good. Last month, a record of new people filed for unemployment compensation. The Bureau of Labor Statistics released the news that nearly 600, 000 people lost their jobs in January 2009 alone.

No doubt, this isn't news for most people. It hits people directly, with who they know, how they spend their money, and aims straight to the core of their ability to be safe and secure in how they will survive.

On February 5th, the small technology and research company I work with as a graphic designer made a difficult decision to restructure into a not-for-profit venture. It was a choice that wasn't easy for the founders of the company to make, but in order for their product to penetrate through to their primary markets of speech language pathologists, research institutions, and universities in a profound way, the company had to move swiftly.

By the end of February 2009, two-thirds of the people I worked with will be laid off. Some people were gone that very Thursday afternoon on February 5th. My hours have been reduced, but I'm still working to do what I know how to aid in the company restructure. 

I've come to know and care about these amazing, professional people, and have respect for each and every one of them. I know any employer would be fortunate to have any of these people involved in their company. Each person has a story of their life. I honor those stories. I don't think many of the people I work with are "stuck" in their stories, though. This is a group of people who seem healthy in how they process their feelings and emotions, and then they take action to move in the direction they want their lives to go.

For me, I have to filter how much news I receive from the media these days. I'm not in denial, and I don't know many people who haven't been affected by the economy. Yet a steady diet of bad news can paralyze opportunity, dreams, and intentions. I want to mobilize and take action. I know that focusing on what I want is more productive than focusing on what I don't want, or even what I fear. It's time to build that place of fearlessness within.

I've started building my social network stronger, because support will make the difference in how I respond to life. Join my network here with Linked In.

The Dawn of a New Day

Most days I wake up before the sun comes up. I work out at the local recreation center, and by the time I'm finished, the hint of a new day colors the sky like a panoramic painting of oranges, blue hues, and deep reds. This morning as I was exiting the recreation center, I happened on the dawn, and I pondered events this day would bring to not only myself, but to people around the planet. Today, we welcomed a new leader with vision, integrity, and purpose into the fold of one of the most difficult and rewarding positions of leadership. And for certain, a new day is dawning, for us all!

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Let us join in the collective community, in support of our new president, Barack Obama. And may our country be blessed.

My Current Badge of Honor

No, that's not an "alien" shirt. That's the back of my cheap t-shirt. After a really hard cardiovascular workout. These days, it's my badge of honor.

I spend my mornings at the local recreation center. I make the time to exercise (when most people are still dreaming under some nice warm blankets). I have to do this. I want to be healthy. And I am committed to the process, no matter how long it takes.

Years ago, maybe 18 or so years ago, I noticed I had a very easy time putting weight on. I always ate healthy, and very rarely "pigged out" or over-ate. I wasn't always highly active, but I wasn't a slug, either. The relationship of what I was eating and why my body processed food the way it did wasn't understood by me. And certainly, western medicine wasn't helping me understand about food, nutrition, or weight. After all, we had the USDA Food Pyramid. And more and more people were becoming overweight, being diagnosed as diabetic, and the belief in the dietetic world was "a carb is a carb is a carb". We know now that belief is a recipe for disaster, and a nation of overweight people. Now we know the pyramid was sponsored by those food companies that provide Americans with the base level of the old pyramid as over-processed, cheap, calorie-laden and nutrient-vacant, easy-to-eat foods. And of course, with the backing of the federal government.


Sometime around 2001, I had an ultrasound, because some liver enzymes were elevated. The ultrasound revealed a "fatty liver". I didn't eat exceptionally fatty foods, so there wasn't a real external reason for the liver issue. I don't drink. But, there it was; another clue in unconcealing what seemed to be a life-long challenge for me and many women. And even another way to beat myself up.

I always had some sleep problems. I had surgery for sleep apnea in 1989, and through the years, I was a problem sleeper. I slept better after being introduced to magnetics (Nikken), but still had some sleep trouble. My body would always feel hot. I was moody. As I got older, the heat and the moods got worse. Finally, after seeing a naturopathic doctor in Arizona, and taking a saliva test, I finally had a diagnosis that connected all the dots. The diagnosis is a metabolic and hormonal issue called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS.

For years, I kept off bread, potatoes, rice, all things that would increase my sugar level. With PCOS, many times there is something called insulin resistance. So the weight stayed on, even through a thorough change in my diet. I exercised a lot. I had people look at me, and tell me, "oh, just do Pilates and build those core muscles".

What I really needed to do was have a team to help me. I also had to step out of denial. Whatever I needed to do, I was willing. Willingness is the first step to recovery.

So, my team consists of a naturopath who knows about PCOS, a chiropractor, the alarm clock that gets me out of bed to go exercise, a massage therapist, and someone I can be accountable to. I hold to a very basic diet of protein, vegetables and fruits (that won't boost sugar levels), seeds and nuts, water, herbal tea and little else. No added sugars, no juice, no sauces, no grains, no honey, no dairy. And I exercise.

I take supplements. About 18 at a time, three times a day.

And I exercise. And exercise. Five times a week. Sometimes for more than an hour. Sometimes more than two hours. And I push myself. I seem to have some endurance in this area. I may be slow, at the beginning, but I am definitely steady. I can spin on the exercise cycle at 105 RPMs for 50 minutes (the resistance level is about a four for 20 minutes, then I step the resistance down). So I'm riding about 11-12 miles in 50 minutes.

I'm getting stronger, and my body is FINALLY responding. It took a while...

How long to I have to do this? I am told, all my life, if I want to be healthy. I no longer am "hot" all the time. My moodiness is gone. I am dropping weight, and my clothes are loosening up. Slowly, but steady. Like the tortoise and the hare, I'm here to win the race.

If you ever wonder what you're committed to, just look at your daily actions and choices. If you don't like what you're getting, make better choices and take action. No one said it would be easy. But, it will be worth it!

And, like the SWOOSH commercial, just DO IT!

Happy New Year 2009

It's been a while since I wrote. A lot has happened in the short span of almost 4 months:

• I completed the second module of coaching training through the Institute for Integrative Coaching; I was coached in my life for 3 months. I still have a lot to work on, now I have the tools to see more and more successes in my life.
• I decided to limit my communications with my father. (My father disappeared out of my life a few years after my mother and father divorced. I was seven. Forty-three years later, I was able to find my father. More on that with another blog.)
• I distanced myself from writing in my blog and chose to work deeply through the coaching and healing process, and that experience let me see many of my life situations and challenges through respectful, peaceful, non-reactive eyes.
• I chose to be fully in the process, and not hung up with the outcome of my decision to go through with coaching training.
• I made a conscious choice to put my need to be healthy as the priority in my life.
• I chose to stop being in denial about a medical diagnosis I received several years ago, and thought I was managing. I decided to create a health team with a naturopath, chiropractor, and massage therapist to aid me in taking stronger and more specific actions toward better health and fitness.
• I exercise 5-6 times a week.
• I dance at least twice a week.
• I take supplements regularly for the condition I was diagnosed with, and I changed my diet to increase my health benefits.
• The US had a presidential election, and the people spoke with their votes. It's an exciting time, full of hope and change. It's full of challenges, and people will face the toughest decisions they ever had to make.
  

• Financial markets are currently fractured around the world.
• I made a visit to Texas to spend time with my beloved aunt in early December.
• My brother in Washington DC got married to his long-time lady friend, with very little fanfare, but with a lot of heart.
• I became secretary of my homeowners association.
• I've continued my volunteering for etown.
  
• I've made some new friends.
• I continue to journal and meditate.
• I paid my quarterly taxes.
• I went to Fort Collins for the first time (and the second time, too).

Although I haven't written in my blog, I have been writing. I decided it was time to focus on what's ahead for me on a day-to-day basis, and take action. Sort of the one-day-at-a-time approach. Some things I had regularly enjoyed doing had to fall by the wayside, but as I learn to manage things large and small that come about in my life, I realize I have been responsible, accountable, and taking action. There are things I want to change, so, like a boat on the seas when the wind changes, I adapt, and learn and grow, and do. As Yoda said, "Do! There is no Try!"
I continue to be committed to my own evolution.
Come join the parade!

Intuition (mostly every day, these days)

When I align my being with what I believe, think, and speak, my intuitive nature comes through. Life becomes more “in the flow”; everything from finances to parking spaces open up for me. I'm more open to my intuitive messages, and hope I can utilize those gifts to help others.

Sometimes intuition move through me as words I actually hear, loud and clear. Those are clairaudient (psychic ability to hear things that are beyond the range of the ordinary power of hearing) signs. I don’t always know what the messages I receive mean when they come through me. I just trust I will understand later. Most of the time, these messages show themselves to something that happens in the future, and sometimes it's about the collective consciousness, and sometimes it's personal. Intuitive messages also come through my dreams. Here are some recent intuitive examples.

Sunday morning, September 28th, between slumber and wakefulness, I heard the words “Put America First”. I thought those were odd words to wake to, but I trusted what I heard, and knew I would understand more. I’ve trusted the messages I receive, and know it’s a gift for me to “see” what cannot be seen with the five senses.


I also decided last week to volunteer for the presidential candidate of my choice that day, canvassing targeted voters, checking if those voters were registered to vote by mail, and collecting data to be used for the “get out the vote” time as election time draws closer. For me, to take action made me feel my energy was assisting in the building the America I want to live in.

Monday, the country found itself deep in a financial crisis, with Congressional lawmakers working toward a “rescue bill” to slow the train wreck of an economy teetering on the brink of collapse. Tuesday, a bill was presented to Congress to vote on, not a great bill, but one that would send a message to the financial markets that the government would steadfastly financially back the poor decisions of financial institutions for their risky investments and lending. Credit for businesses large and small has become increasingly tight, and the reality of more and more smaller operations going under will have a major impact on us all. Congress failed to pass this rescue legislation. On Tuesday, September 29, the stock market plummeted, dropping almost 800 points, its worst loss ever.

Suddenly, the words I heard made sense. “Put America First” meant to me, coming to an agreement that served Americans, not the egos of the Congressional body.

________________________________________________________

Last night, I dreamed I was having tea with a friend. My friend and I were sitting outside, and the weather was beautiful, with absolutely blue, clear skies, and leafy, autumn trees as our semi-shady canopy. Suddenly, ants fell on me. Large, red ants, and they were biting me. My friend and I shook them off us as fast and furiously as we could. And I woke up, remembering every visual and tactile detail of my dream.

I recently talked to my aunt, whom I love dearly, so I thought maybe that was some subconscious spill-over. I also am working rapidly on lots of creative graphic projects, and I know that the ant symbolizes the ant totem of the hard worker, as well as a creature needing community for its survival. The ant works for the good of the whole. Ants also are very strong, with the ability to lift 20 to 50 times its own weight. I feel strong these days, yet lighter in many ways.

This evening, when I came home, I started chatting with my next door neighbor. I didn’t park inside my garage, knowing I would be running out to the grocery store later. As we talked, I looked down on my driveway, and there was a solid mass of hundreds upon hundreds of ants in a paved divide of my driveway.



When I get messages from my dreams, or I hear words loud and clear, that couldn’t possibly be anything I would normally (or abnormally) think about, it’s definitely time to tune in deeply to my internal landscape, and notice my external landscape. As the two blend, I receive the message I’m on the path to discover more about my intuitive gifts.

Fiscal Responsibility

When I talk to people, there's very little certainty about the nation's economy. We've seen major financial institutions on Wall Street and in the banking sector disappear for risky investment decisions, to be bought and paid for by more solvent and solid companies, with some of these companies getting incredible deals, and looking toward their future expansion.

What I am noticing, when I view the current economic situation is fear. But what I understand in my education is the fear has been there all the time. At the time of crisis, people become "more" of what they are. 

FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real

I've talked to people who are considering extracting tens of thousands of dollars from their 401K savings to put in the bank. I don't think they've taken a look at what's really happening with our country and the economic woes. They base their information solely on the media. Their choices are to operate out of emotions. Emotions can tell a lot of things about what's going on inside you. Sometimes our emotions revert us back to our wounded child. I don't think I would want my 7 year-old wound self making decisions that could impact my future opportunities. So I don't operate from my emotions, unless I've done my emotional "sit-ups". I ask the hard questions. I research. I tune in and don't numb out. And I definitely don't follow the herd.

Yes, I've seen my retirement savings lose about 11% in the past several months. If I were to "cash out" my savings, I would be losing a whole lot more than that, (more like giving the tax structure a great big present) and I would be operating under fear. I'm not in denial. I invested for the long term, not the short term (short term, risky returns is the reason this mess got started anyway). I actually know there's some big opportunities to be had in the current market, and my optimism isn't misplaced.

If fear or any other emotion drives your decisions, whether you are in a crisis, or moving through life with with no parachute needed, you are not in control. Your emotions are running the show. When you trust information from outside yourself, you are letting the environment you live in dictate your choices. I'm not saying to live in denial. I'm saying, conduct your life with due diligence, investigate, research, know how you emotionally operate, and why you do what you do. A life coach can help you see the big picture of yourself and your best life.

Look at how you respond to life and crisis. It's important to train yourself to be emotionally fit. Discover your emotional patterns, and when the news isn't what you'd rather hear, have the tools to handle life with creativity and live life on your own sensible terms, not living life by operating on how other people and the current environment look and feel.



Before I left for the last coaching intensive, we were asked to look at one area of our life, where we needed to improve. I chose my finances. We were asked to come up with an action step that was measurable, that we could take, to radically improve our life in that specific area. I chose to create a budget for myself, and a plan to pay my current debt down. I also challenged myself to spend money only where I felt it was important to, and although I would love to go to workshops where I can learn and grow, I decided to put my present and future first, stick with a payment plan so I could have stability to do the things I know I want to do later. Since much of my income was from freelancing, one of the other things I knew I needed to take action on was to find a reliable work position that paid me on a regular basis. I couldn't produce a budget if I didn't know what my income looked like.

It took some time, but I found the perfect work opportunity, and really am enjoying the work I'm doing. I threw a lot of fishing lines out to find the position I currently have, and was willing to do most anything in my field, but I also allowed myself to think bigger, and out of the box, and my work life is better than I could have imagined since I chose to be open-minded and look at unlimited possibilities, and not see myself doing something specific, and pigeon-hole myself and my skills.

It's important to build certainty in my own life, and make plans to succeed. That's why I am being trained as an integrative coach. I know I will be able to help others get what they want with my excellent training.

The best part about building certainty, is creating fun along the way, and knowing that life can be better than I ever imagined!

Safety in Community

Recently, I spent some time with the amazing community of coaches, participants, assistants, and staff of the Ford Institute for Integrative Coaching. And, of course, Debbie Ford, who always makes me smile and think with my heart. For four days, we immersed ourselves in the processes of revealing our individual “blueprints” of behaviors and actions, to uncover the gifts our habits, beliefs, patterns, and stories had to offer. To know my own story, and to know that I am not solely my story assists me to "step out" of my story, my limited perception in who I am and what I'm capable of, and I can understand the bigger picture of my part in the community of humankind. Allowing me to reveal my story, as well as opening up to others and hearing their stories by really listening with my heart, without judgment can unlock the shackles of limitation imprisoning us, keeping us stuck and small. When someone like a well-trained coach holds the global reflection to me of the “bigger picture” of my true potential, I am gifted with endless possibilities.

My blogs to come will reflect on thoughts and ideas planted and fertilized from the Blueprint Intensive. Four days of dwelling in many thought-provoking processes, allowing myself to feel connected to so many people (some on this journey with me since my first Shadow Process with the Ford Institute from September 2007) and having this family allow me to be a witness to extraordinary shifts in personal perception is both humbling and exhilarating. I love myself more, and I love all the people on this path. Internal reflection is, to me, a sacred journey, and I do my best to open that vast portal of sacredness in all I do. When even cleaning the cat litter box becomes a sacred act, there's not much to avoid, procrastinate on, or numb out to. (Maybe cleaning cat litter isn't my most favorite sacred act, but my sweet 17-year old cat Sturgis offers me such incredible unconditional love and fun, and he thinks it's a vital act, and so it is.) When we connect all the actions of our lives with deep holiness and reverence, every single act, sort of like connecting the dots on a piece of paper to reveal the visual picture that helps shape our understanding of this life, the shifts in perception become more noticeable and frequent. 

There are many people on this planet, walking this path of self-discovery, recovery, honoring their divine nature, and remembering. In this special community of the Institute for Integrative Coaching, safety and confidentiality is a paramount element, and hopefully my writings exhibit respect for those elements with humor and love. Debbie and her staff build a safe container of love, non-judgment, respect, and wisdom, and I have learned from my own "story", and other people on this path that feeling safe truly is the gift I can give myself, as well as hold the space for others and their safety.

Louise L. Hay's affirmation “I am safe, and all is well in my world” comes to mind. Allow that affirmation to become you in this moment.

My new web site

I have updated my web site. It's been a long time coming.

http://www.lorishin.com

There's still a lot of refining to do, but it's been more work and more fun than I thought it would be.